29 04 2010

Liminality (from the Latin word līmen, meaning “a threshold”) The liminal state is characterized by ambiguity, openness, and indeterminacy. One’s sense of identity dissolves to some extent, bringing about disorientation. Liminality is a period of transition where normal limits to thought, self-understanding, and behavior are relaxed – a situation which can lead to new perspectives. (Wikipedia)

ok so i’ve been away on a chilled-out holiday for the last month – what’ve i got to say for myself?

not much as it turns out.

despite the calm and stillness of being away & not having to think about much at all, the faerie of inspiration hasn’t laid an egg on my yellow brick road.

it’s probably too early to say this in seriousness, but i’ll say it anyway.  i think my days of city living are numbered.

i’ve always felt drawn to the Northern Rivers area of NSW, an affinity with its geography, climate, way & pace of life, and even some of its inhabitants.  it was “option 2” when i decided to move to Melbourne 10 years ago.  whilst i don’t regret my move to Melbourne, with the benefit of hindsight & if i had a do-over, i’d probably choose option 2.  but which begs 2 questions:

– if i had chosen option 2 back then, would i tire of the remoteness of country living & want to come back to one of the big smokes now?

– if i choose option 2 now, am i setting myself up for another 10/whatever year cycle & want to change it all again?

stupid unanswerable questions really, i know, but this comes back to yearnings that came up 10-12 years ago, that i believe i left unresolved when i moved to Melbourne 10 years ago, becoming distracted by the challenge of changing everything (home, work, friends) by moving interstate; a distraction that lasted several years, but once that dust settled, i think has been one (of unknown qty) key contributor to my dysthymia.

as usual when i’m up there, i wonder what i could do to support myself (financially) up there.  re-create a bunch of clients in IT consulting?  do something that can be done virtually anywhere with a broadband connection (electronics design? iPhone/iPad app development?)?  or something completely different?  these are options i’m now giving serious consideration to.

and then there’s Paul.  i hired him in my last workin-for-the-man Sydney job in 99, & we’ve stayed in touch ever since.  we seem to have some kind of connection, exactly what i’ve never been sure, but certainly kindred spirits in some ways, especially when it comes to a growing dissatisfaction with city living.  when we caught up at Easter, long story short, he’s thinking of ‘going bush’, perhaps to the Northern Rivers, and living the kind of lifestyle that i think he’s always wanted.

and he asked if i was interested in joining him.  which kinda blew me away!

it’s an extremely tempting offer, but until i either clear my debts by doing what i do in Melbourne, or find alternative income up there, i’m kinda stuck where i am.

we’re having lunch again today…


remember to breathe

24 04 2010

i bought a yoga mat on Sunday!  i just had the sudden urge while getting a great massage from Jessica at Byron Medicine Wheel.

i’ve done morning yoga on my little beach-house’s first-floor morning-sun-facing deck three mornings this week!  rusty yoga, but at least some of the yoga i did back in 04/05 is coming back to me.  i’m so stiff.  much work to do.

did i ever mention i went to several nude-yoga classes back then?  Doug was a pretty hot yoga instructor.  wouldn’t mind going there again.

many many years ago on another Byron holiday, i bought a ‘Remember To Breathe” sticker from one of the many shops practicing random acts of love and kindness, for a price.  i have it to this day, on my PC monitor.

breathing is important in yoga.  it’s also important when trying to wind down on holidays!

i think it took me 10 days housesitting in Terranora just to ramp down to Byron pace.  after 6 days/nights here, i’ve extended my stay here an extra 4;  i still feel like breathing more of Byron :)